Babeland Edible Body Chocolate: A review

Babeland edible body chocolate

Here’s the thing…I am not at all a chocoholic (what the fuck, spell check?  Since when is that a word?).

I like a little bit every now and then, but most of the time I can just do without.

Also, I am not really a fan of mixing food and fucking.  I mean, I can appreciate the sensuality that goes along with being fed by a lover, but I am not into licking whipped cream off of body parts or incorporating food into the actual act of sex. No thanks.

That being said, I went ahead and decided to snag some of Babeland’s Edible Body Chocolate when they offered it up for review.

I have tried body chocolate before…and, surprise…I wasn’t a fan.

Like…go to your fridge and grab some chocolate syrup, if you have it.  Now go squirt it all over someone and lick it off.

Ick.

That’s kinda how I’ve always felt about body chocolate.  But, this stuff that Babeland put out has gotten rave reviews, right?

So I wanted to see what all of the fuss was about…and if it would live up to the hype.

Babeland Body Chocolate Review

Babeland edible body chocolateFor starters, I heart the packaging.  I know, it’s uber simple.  I like that.  It comes in one and four ounce sizes.

That might not sound like much, but unless you just scrape the stuff out of the jar and eat it on its own, it really should last you quite a while.

It has an 18 month shelf life and should be stored in a cool place.  It does not have to be refrigerated, however, so unless you live inside the sun you can keep it in your toy box/bedside drawer/wherever the hell you keep stuff you use during naughty time.

You know what else is pretty awesome about this product?  It is all natural, organic, fair trade and vegan. Fuck yeah.  Here are the ingredients, if you’re curious:

  1. Sucrose (Organic Sugar)
  2. Theobroma cacao (Organic Cocoa)
  3. Cocos nucifera (Organic Coconut) Oil
  4. Vitis vinifera (Grape) Seed Oil
  5. Vanilla planifolia (Vanilla) Extract
  6. Tocopherol (Vitamin E)

Texture

The texture of the body chocolate, when solid, is a slightly gritty.  Not in an off putting way, mind you.  It has a very natural texture.  I don’t know how to best describe it…it reminds me a bit of the texture of those yummy Ferrero Rocher chocolates, but not nearly as extreme as that.

When the chocolate has been warmed and is all liquidy, it still has a barely gritty texture.  Stir up the liquefied chocolate and the grittiness pretty much disappears and it becomes smooth and spreadable…it is very easy to write or paint with on skin.

To warm it up I don’t suggest microwaving…you might melt your jar.  Just sit it on a sunny window sill for a while or place it in a bowl of hot water.

Taste

Alright…so what does this stuff taste like? A Mounds candy bar.  Yep.  I love it.  But I like dark chocolate and I love coconut.  If you despise either of those things, stay away.

So…it is pretty damn delicious.

It tastes like good dark chocolate should taste…so it’s slightly bitter (for those of you unfamiliar with dark chocolate).

Don’t get me wrong, you probably won’t catch me hiding in the bathroom spooning this stuff down my throat with my fingers…but I do occasionally sneak a little bit.

While I appreciate good chocolate, I don’t crave it often…and a little of this licked off of my finger tip is just the right amount to satisfy the odd craving.

Performance

Now, performance? Eh.  I haven’t tried it out with the boyfriend yet…we just haven’t had the time or the privacy.

He is not a chocolate or coconut fan, so when we try it out this weekend (and we will, and I’ll update) I’ll be the one doing the licking.

I smeared some on my arm and licked it off just to see it in action.  It’s thick and rich, but pretty easy to write or paint with.

It is a bit harder to get it all licked off.  It takes a bit of work.  I dunno…I said it earlier, but mixing food and sex is just not that sexy to me.

We’ll try it out…and I can see it being silly and we’ll probably have fun with it, but I don’t see us using this very often.  Also, it won’t be going near any naughty bits.

It is sugary…and I don’t want that business in my vagina.  You don’t either, unless you really like yeast infections (you don’t).

So yeah…if you are into body chocolate or licking yummies off of a partner (or yourself), run on over to this awesome sex toy store and pick some up for yourself.  It really is quite tasty.

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