Review: Shane’s World Campus Hottie Masturbator

Shanes World Masturbator

It’s almost as good as Fleshlight’s Navi masturbator, you know, the one with two clits.

It’s almost as good, but not quite.

This little doobie is a vagina, though, with cheap-womanizing packaging

It also does not have texture. (Unless you turn it inside out, which is hard to do, and you can’t do all the way because of the tiny hole at the bottom end which is supposed to be useful for cleaning, but only makes this booger hard as fuck to clean)

Except for the realistic but clear labia that add a great touch to this unique but not-good-enough masturbator, there’s nothing else to be excited about.

The materials

Okay, so onto materials, especially since I want to write a review on this because I happen to like it and am the one who would use it if I had a dick. Which sadly, I think to myself sometimes, I don’t.

The Hottie is made of TPE, which is basically thermoplastic rubber and is also known as TPR.

You can use silicone-based or water-based lubricants with this masturbator, and I’m glad silicone can be used, since I didn’t know it could.

I will continue to use only water-based though, as we always only use water-based, especially when I want to play around with it. (I actually played around with it when I first got it, putting my Crystal Jellies Ballsy dildo into it and having fun with Jonathan while he was playing Halo: Reach).

The size

The masturbator is 8 1/2 inches long, a little over 3 inches wide (can fit a penis width of up to 2 1/2 inches), with a vaginal depth of 6 inches. Its circumfrence is 7 1/4 inches (I’m not too sure what circumfrence is, so call me an idiot on this one), and its weight is exactly 12.5 ounces for good measure.

Gritty details aside, we contine on to how it felt to Jonathan and I, et cetera.

California Exotics’ toyline sucks.

All of it.

I hate California Exotics for their cheap sex toys with their (in my opinion) sexist toy packaging, and the lack of safety in some of their toy materials. (They make a lot of jelly products).

I think they’re only making stuff like that to make money, and it disappoints me. So I don’t even know why I got this masturbator for Jonathan, really. Mainly because he didn’t like the Autumn, I guess.

So if you don’t like texture, you won’t find any in this masturbator. It’s very stretchy and flexible, but it doesn’t have any texture inside.

It’s just smooth.

I know Jonathan doesn’t like a lot of texture (well, we don’t really know much about his opinion on texture because this is only the 3rd masturbator he’s tried), but this is the perfect lack of texture for any man.

I’m sure any man would come away disappointed at the lack of texture in this vagina. There aren’t any ribs at all inside of this vagina except for the tiny little hole at the end of the canal that is the exit for cleaning it out. And I have no idea why there are ribs in that area of this vagina. No idea at all.

So you’ll have to hold this floppy gal with two hands to get the long tunnel of love to stay on your shaft, because of the way it is.

It’s very long, and won’t stay straight unless you do this. You can say it’s a handheld toy, then, and that you’ll most likely have to hold it with two hands.

Personally I wish it had a case much like the Fleshlight, to keep it from flopping around, and to keep it easy-to-use with one hand. Sadly, this isn’t so. I wonder if I could put it in a Fleshlight case though. Would it fit?

I just think it’s funny that it feels so much like jelly. Yes, I know I’m random, but I’m sure someone loves it. Probably you. Hahaha.

I think a little added tidbit I should add is that this toy is great for stimulating the testicles of a man’s penis, because of the labia on this toy. It may also be good for stimulating the head of the penis as well. That can be taken in different strides, and may work better for some, and not so good for others. Either way, it’s an idea.

The first and second time we used this vagina (I used it on him, which we both find erotic-we did that last time with the Tenga Egg before we had to throw it away (You wouldn’t believe the particles those things’ silicone texture collects! Damn!))

We warmed it up first in a pot of hot water. Not a large pot, but a small one, was fine. Plus it was cheaper than one of those unnecessary sex toy warmers. You don’t need those.

So I guess you can use a little temperature play on this toy. You can either use it at the temperature it comes with, which even at room temperature is pretty cold, or you can warm it up in hot water, so it will feel a lot more comfortable.

I must admit that I was impressed that this toy didn’t smell at all when I recieved it. I suppose this is because it is made of TPE (thermoplastic rubber/TPR), but one can only assume. It mostly reminds me of jelly, again, and silicone, in a way, because of the lack of smell and a tad bit of the feel. But I am glad it doesn’t smell.

This masturbator is a semi-porous toy. Which means that it is still porous, but not as much as cyberskin. And since TPR isn’t as porous as cyberskin but is more porous than silicone, I definitely recommend using a condom every time you use/share this toy. (I won’t be sharing, though, with Jonathan, especially since I don’t have a dick. I would however, like to play with it with my dildos, LOL.)

TPR toys can’t be disinfected with boiling water like most silicone toys, sadly, but you can wash this toy with warm water and toy cleaner/soap.

This toy isn’t the easiest to hide, and it needs to be stored in a plastic bag (We keep it in the bag it comes in) so it doesn’t collect particles, like hair. I don’t think I would travel with it. I’d rather travel with a Fleshlight. This one would be much too difficult to travel with.

Another disappointment I have (Aren’t we full of those today?) is that the packaging (er, the box, which is recyclable by the way) doesn’t describe much about the product, other than that it’s made of TPE. That a water-based lubricant should be used. That the product is a trademark of California Exotics. And a few other things about the company, and the copyright, bla bla bla.

There’s nothing on cleaning, size, interior details, colour variations, et cetera. There are a lot of things that sex toy companies don’t put on their packaging that are crucial to the existence of the product.

Why the fuck is that?

You know, personally, I think it’s so that the product can deteriorate so we have to go back and get another one, or a different one, thus making them more money. *AnGrY fAcE* Damn corporations.

All in all, I’m going to have to rate this toy 3 stars. I’m closer to a 2 than a 3 at this point, and Jonathan’s take on it is pretty similar. He told me to give it a two. So perhaps I’m always a bit generous, eh?

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